Au pairs provide childcare and household tasks for a minimum of 12 months. They also share their culture with your children, offering more than daycare or a nanny can.
The Money
A nanny au pair costs much less than hiring a nanny or daycare center. In addition to their weekly stipend, au couples receive free room and board from their host family. Most families also cover out-of-pocket household expenses (like particular toiletries or a cable box in the au pair’s room); some may contribute to her education. But if you’re not careful, the financial aspect of hiring an au pair can get out of hand. A wrong au pair can drain your home’s joy and your wallet. Unfortunately, bad apples exist in every line of work. It’s essential to take the time to interview multiple candidates and speak with them several times before your match. Au pair candidates are generally younger (18 to 26 years old) than nannies or daycare workers, which means they have more energy to keep up with your children’s demands. They’re also often from abroad, allowing your kids to learn about other cultures and share their own with their new “big sister.” Au pairs are required to attend classes through their program. Most families commit to helping their au pair meet their educational requirements by providing transportation, especially if they live far from mass transit or a public school that offers classes.
The Time
As with any childcare, an au pair must be interviewed and screened thoroughly before being matched with your family. This process takes time, and it is essential to think about what your family needs from the au pair you want to hire. You’ll also need to do some initial legwork with your au pair, such as helping her set up a bank account and showing her how to use household appliances (some au couples come from countries where these are uncommon). You will also need to provide her with food and transportation to classes and agency events, though you may be able to split the cost of these expenses with another au pair in your area or find a ride-share option to minimize costs. Utility usage will also increase with another adult living in your home.
Finally, au pairs typically stay with their families for one year. Compared to daycare or a nanny, this is a longer commitment and can feel like a giant leap of faith to take on a stranger as a part of your household.
Of course, it’s also possible for an au pair to fall in love with your children and become a part of the family in a way other caregivers can’t. This can make it feel much less risky and is often considered a huge benefit of the au pair program.
The Experience
In a time when many families are pinching pennies, it’s important to remember the value that these unique caregivers can provide. When you consider writing checks to an au pair agency and directly depositing funds into your child’s care, it’s easy to see where your money is going — and that it is putting something valuable in the hands of young children who need it more than anything else. In addition to childcare responsibilities, au pairs often participate in the family’s daily lives and activities, making them a part of the household. Many au pairs say they feel like a sister or brother to their host children and that these close relationships impact the kids’ emotional and social development. Moreover, au pairs are often cultural ambassadors who can introduce the children to different world cultures and ways of life. They also typically stay with their hosts for one year to connect with and learn from various people. That experience can teach the kids that there are many different paths to take and can help open their minds to possibilities they may not have considered before.
The People
Hiring an au pair isn’t just about monetary costs. Parents also need to ensure that their new household member is fit for their family and can provide the best possible childcare. During interviews, look for answers that mention the importance of a positive parenting approach. How an au pair would handle a child’s misbehavior or defiance, for instance, is an essential indicator of her ability to establish discipline techniques that promote self-reflection and lead to positive outcomes. Parents should also ask how an au pair would respond to a medical or other emergency and her plan for dealing with it. It’s worth remembering that bad apples are in every line of work, and au pairs are no exception. But most au pairs are dedicated, hardworking, and passionate about their work. They want to help children of all ages live better by providing quality care and opening their eyes to a culture outside their own. The cost of childcare is a significant factor for most families, but it’s essential to understand that there are other ways to maximize value from your au pair. By making clear expectations, communicating regularly, and offering meaningful feedback, you can ensure that your au pair is on track to deliver the results you need from her.
